25 June 2009

Change Is Permanent

No one can persuade another to change. Each of us guards a gate of change that can only be opened from the inside. We cannot open the gate of another, either by argument or emotional appeal.

Brain juice: There are no permanent changes because change itself is permanent.

21 June 2009

Your Light Will Shine When All Else Fades

I feel pain right now.
As they all say, first cut is the deepest.
It is really painful now.

It happened in the church kitchen this morning, right before Bible study class. I got cut in between my fingers by a cup that broke. I did not feel the immediate pain of the accident. In fact I didn't even realize that my hand was covered with blood. And mind you, the cut was pretty deep till I can see my own flesh. Looked like chicken meat. Haha. Sadly, my hand has a hole now. =( And I think my right eye is infected because it is red for no reason. Hopefully it isn't conjunctivitis or anything serious. Anyway to my rescue came Bill Liew and three other aunties who were so happened in the kitchen and are also experienced nurses. They were trying to stop the blood, then they cleaned my wound with some antiseptic (I think). After being a little surprised at how on earth I injured my hand, I found it kind of funny. It didn't hurt as much, and I felt warm inside looking at the people around me who were so concerned for me even though I barely know them. It's nice to know that people care. =)

It got me thinking, that in order to know what happiness and joy is, one must first go through and know what pain is like. Other people's kindness, cares and concern, be it towards me or others, puts a smile on my face. I felt glad after I injured myself. Weird, I know. Lol. Like Vincent said, I was smiling and giggling instead of worrying about the wound. He said I seemed happy to cut myself. Doink fella. =.=''

Anyway, I never planned to write about this today, because I never thought something like this would have taken place. Will upload a photo of my delicate fingers later k? Hahaha.

I actually wanted to write about last night. It was night worship, we used the new EY crib in the new hall for the 1st time, and it was also my first time singing as back-up. It was a night of firsts. Hehh. We didn't have much practice because earlier we were busy setting up the equipments and instruments. And Bill Liew changed the songs last minute, and I had to learn 2 of 'em there and then! Imagine, my first time singing and I don't even know the songs! Obviously I wanted to do my best. I felt nervous and anxious, but still excited. I kept telling myself it is not the voice or the singing that matters most, but the desire and intention of praising and worshiping God from the heart. There were some off keys here and there, but I think I managed to pull it through. It felt great! I have always had the desire to sing in a worship team since I came to church, but never really said or do anything about it because I didn't think I had what it takes.

I realize, that all I really need is Him. I may not know much, or have much, but He worked through me. Today was my 2nd time handling the Bible study class, and I learned much from what I was suppose to teach, or I would prefer to use the word 'guide' my 'students'. The passage that I could relate most to was when God wanted to send Moses to bring the Israelites out of Egypt. Moses the horse, Moses the mule. I think I'm more of like the mule, which is a badddd thing. While studying the passage, it really spoke to me. God really spoke to me. I don't know where to begin on how He spoke to me or what He spoke to me about, but I know one thing: with God, everything is possible.

We humans tend to rely on our OWN abilities, our own talents, our own knowledge and understanding, our own everything. But who is the one who blessed us with whatever that we have right now? Is it not God? We don't actually own anything. Everything belongs to the Lord. He gave it to you, and He can take it away. Be it anything physical, material, etc. Who are we to say what we have or achieve is entirely by our own strength, hard work, intelligence and worth?

This weekend has been a long one for me. It may be one of the weekends where I really did something productive for God and learned much about Him and His goodness.

I feel that my journey has just only begun.

19 June 2009

I made Z cry.
I'm. sorry.

18 June 2009

Silent Symphony

I got a sneak preview of Korean Praise '09 last night, as mom wanted me to accompany her to CGBC for it. It was great! The worship and the message was good. Additional score points: the gorg lady singers and the oh-so-handsome male lead singer, and even the pastor too! Hee. I'm sure it's gonna be more awesome in Elim this Friday. Can't wait!

Brain juice moment: I might not be true to my ideals always, but I believe in the law of love. I do not believe in the law of hate.

16 June 2009

My baby Paq is backkkk!
Yayy yayy yayy yayy! (:

07 June 2009

We Were Boxing, You Were Swinging From Mars

It has been one busy busy week! So many errands to run, places to go, CHC, appointments to meet, endless meet-ups and yum cha sessions, movie outings, book fair visits and shopping. Phew. Tiring tiring tiring because I had to wake up early the whole week and now I lack lots of sleep. At last some time to really online and stock up on my collection of movies and TV series. =D

CHC was great fun indeed. I miss the kids in my group. Sometimes hard to handle, but worth it. And they kept calling me 'xiao huang', which means little yellow. LOL. They can be really nice and angelic and lovely and the minute you turn away they change into 100% naughtyness. And Jeremy who was afraid of chipmunks and VERY into Transformers. Super adorable lor. And Kar Men came back on Friday night! She surprised me till I 'eeeek-ed' when I saw her and she had tears in her eyes. Kar Men, if you're reading this, I miss you and I'm waiting to hear more stories from you! It's just amazing that we've gotten close. I'm so glad I have such wonderful people around me. Yes, you, you, you and maybe you who's currently reading this too. =)

It's just so fast that one month of my hols have passed and I have exactly one more month to go. Ah, what the heck. Ipoh's just the place I wanna be.

p/s: There's a full moon tonight, and it looks so bright. It is beautiful. It really is. One day, I'm gonna fulfill this little wish I have out of my so many wishes - to lie on the rooftop and just enjoy looking at the stars and the moon.